Excerpt from my book

I’m currently running a 48 hour promo sales campaign on Amazon for 99 cents (ebook version). In order to give my potential readers a taste of my book I would like to share an excerpt from “The Uncensored Truth: Let’s Talk About Sex” with you. The following is a part of chapter 18:

TRUTH AND FICTION

Sexual compatibility:

People’s sexual desires are as unique as their personality traits. You’d be surprised how many people are way less “vanilla” (meaning ordinary) than you think. The shy guy you meet every day at the office might be the one who’s a foot fetishist, or the lady who works at the bank might be into autoerotic asphyxia (a practice where the person has an orgasm while being strangled in some form). You never know what really hides behind someone’s façade. You need to consider that when you get into a relationship with someone, there could be a lot of “dark secrets.” I use that term with great reluctance because it insinuates that it’s something negative. I do so because it’s a common phrase for hidden desires but in no way do I mean to berate anyone’s sexual preferences. It takes time to reveal certain things to a new partner. Aside from that, many people feel reluctant because they had a negative experience in the past when a partner didn’t take their “confession” so well. For a person to come forward with something a bit out of the ordinary, it often takes some guts and maybe a little time to build up enough confidence and trust to do so. When that happens (if your partner is brings it up), it’s best to keep an open mind and see if it’s something you might want to try out. Most importantly, don’t berate them in any form. Oftentimes these desires are not so far “out there,” meaning it could be something simple as a guy wanting his lady to wear a certain outfit, spank her, likes it a bit rough, or wants her to do more dirty talk. It goes without saying that it could be the other way around. You want something a bit more unique and you’re afraid to say it.

Here is my take on it: It’s definitely better to bring it up to find out if you’re sexually compatible. There are a lot of things people can try, but sometimes it might be too much of a stretch (for example if someone wants to be seriously hurt while having sex).

The same goes for a very different libido. For the most part, if you have the kind of incredible sex as discussed in this book, that shouldn’t be a problem because you’re in a sexual paradise but, in some cases, it could still be an issue. Let’s say one wants to have sex 4, 5 times a day, while the other can’t handle more than two, 3 times a week.

If the sexual preferences are very different and you can’t compromise in some form, I can pretty much guarantee you that the relationship will not work out. Unfortunately, people often end up dragging it out, sometimes for years, before the inevitable happens and they part ways.

I knew a couple where the woman was very “mainstream” sexually, while the man was rather exotic. He was into sex with transsexuals and transgender people and had a thing for very young women (he and his girlfriend were middle aged). He loved the BDSM scene, exotic porn, anything out of the ordinary – you name it. While he was a really nice guy and loved her, he was living a double life and had been for years and he knew that she could never deal with his secret. They loved each other very much but by chance (he was in the hospital and she went through his stuff to bring him clothes) she found out about it. Obviously she was deeply hurt, and he felt very embarrassed. Ultimately it resulted in a break up. One can argue if they couldn’t have saved years by being more open with each other, and ultimately prevented a lot of pain, as a breakup is always inevitably harder the longer you’re together. I think it’s never smart to let it come that far, because eventually it will come out, one way or another. The hard truth is that one can’t suppress their true nature forever, no matter how much they love their partner.

While there are a lot of things people can try if they keep an open mind to make it work, some things are just not doable. For those who are in such a situation, whether you suspect it with your partner or you’re the one who’s carrying around a dark secret, try to approach the subject with your partner in a subtle, understanding way. Signal that you’re okay with talking about it. Yes, it will take a lot of guts to bring it up, but never forget that your partner loves you. Hopefully, they will react in a way that reflects their love. If not, it just adds to the fact that you’re partnership was not meant to be. As long as these conversations are handled with dignity, respect, and love, it should be fine whether you want to try and experiment with whatever the fantasy or preference or not and it’s the end of the road for the two of you.

_____________________________________________

DivisonHouse Publishing

The Uncensored Truth: Let’s Talk About Sex

L.G. Erikson

© by L.G. Erikson. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form by any means without the permission of the author. This includes reprints, excerpts, photocopying, recording or any future means of reproducing text.

If you would like to do any of the above, please seek permission by contacting us at:

letstalkaboutsexthebook@gmail.com

www.amazon.com/Uncensored-Truth-Lets-Talk-About-ebook/dp/B00U3CRPM6/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1425409263&sr=8-1&keywords=the+uncensored+truth%3A+let%27s+talk+about+sex

Advertisements

A New Take on Sexuality

I’d like to take a moment to introduce my new book The Uncensored Truth: Let’s Talk About Sex to the world and talk a bit about the background of its development.

Like many people, I’ve read a lot of articles, blog posts and books on the nature of sexuality. Commonly we do this to satisfy our curiosity, to see if there’s something we don’t know, or to find new inspiration on how to enhance our sex life.

One thing a lot of these books/articles/blog posts seem to have in common is pointing out the differences between the genders, and how to overcome them. This raised a lot of questions in my mind. Are these so-called differences really the reason for our troubles in the bedroom?

Being very inquisitive by nature, I started to have a lot of conversations with men and women about sex, relationships and human behavior in general.

I’ve met people from all kinds of social backgrounds and eventually, I came to an important conclusion. The main problem is not the differences between the genders but the lack of communicating all aspects of sexuality in a real kind of way, without sugarcoating everything.

Our society doesn’t really address the real issues, mainly because we’ve learned to become very good at using what is called “white lies” to cover up anything that could potentially hurt someone. I have a different take on this: what one has to say shouldn’t be the issue; it’s how you say it, that’s what matters.

I will give you a simple example to show how that could work:

A couple is getting ready to go to an event. The woman asks the man if he likes her outfit. Unfortunately, it’s not very flattering. Now, often that leads him to just say, “no, you look good,” and she doesn’t change her outfit. But why couldn’t he say it in a positive way if the outfit doesn’t look good at all? Let’s say the shape is awful and unflattering, but the color looks good on her. He could say something like this: “Honey, I love the color on you, it looks very good with your skin tone, but the design is not a good fit for you.”

That’s just a very general example of how we could handle “tricky” situations. Same goes for sex. If we avoid addressing desires we have, or sexual boredom, it just leads to bigger problems. Another thing often not addressed is the importance of sex in relationships. Society labeled it a taboo to even admit how important sex is in a relationship. One has to be friends above all. While that is important, it’s a fatal mistake to base your romantic relationship on that.

Let’s get to the key element, the one that is so often blamed for our miscommunication and problems with our sexuality: Are men and women really that different?

I don’t think that’s true at all. All the literature out there that has made such a big effort to close the so-called gap between the genders just made them drift apart even more. If anything, they reinforced the belief that we are incapable of understanding each other. No one is born with stereotypes in their head. Almost every aspect of male/female issues is rooted in our upbringing. That develops gradually, while you grow up. It was very important for me to break that down in my book, to show my reader that any differences we might have in our nature are related to our personalities, not our gender.

Another reason that motivated me to write this book were sexual taboos; and I realized something else: The role of sexuality in our lives is grossly misconstrued. In fact, most people have no idea what mind-blowing sex really is.

In my research, I came across a lot of interesting, juicy stories about sexual encounters, and I used them to give my readers a very clear picture of  mind-blowing sex. What is difference between “normal” sex and mind-blowing sex?

I’m gonna sum this up with a quote from my book:

When people have “normal” sex, they’re in their own world during the act; when people have mind-blowing sex it’s about merging these two worlds into one.

How do you do that? All of that is explained in my book in great detail.

One of my friends called it “the encyclopedia of sex,” after reading it. It was my vision to write a book that serves as a true eye-opener in every aspect regarding sex, a book that doesn’t shy away from any topic. I wanted it to suit any kind of scenario – from relationships to one-night-stands.  It was my greatest desire to liberate and empower my readers, to give them straightforward insights in ways never done before.

http://www.amazon.com/Uncensored-Truth-Lets-Talk-About-ebook/dp/B00U3CRPM6/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1425409263&sr=8-1&keywords=the+uncensored+truth%3A+let%27s+talk+about+sex

Newly released book

I’ve written and published my first book

“The Uncensored Truth: Let’s Talk About Sex”

Book description:

What exactly is mind-blowing sex? Are women and men really that different? Why is sex so important for our well-being?

The author fearlessly explains in juicy details what it takes — for anyone — to experience real sexual bliss. “Let’s Talk About Sex” gives you an unprecedented insight into the nature of sexuality from every possible angle. Packed with loads of information and highly entertaining stories we learn how to discover our true nature. Whether you’re in a relationship or into one night stands, this book has something for everyone.

In a refreshingly straightforward language, the author tackles social and sexual taboos and encourages all readers to truly become themselves.

A bold, fascinating, and empowering read that will make you rethink everything you’ve learned about sex.

Blurb:
“No matter your age, every man’s dream is in this book! Finally, I understand
what most women are really thinking about and during sex. A great read at any age!”

— Jack Peterson
Author of the bestseller “Balance of Power” and “A Thin Place”

Now on sale:

http://www.amazon.com/Uncensored-Truth-Lets-Talk-About-ebook/dp/B00U3CRPM6/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1425409263&sr=8-1&keywords=the+uncensored+truth%3A+let%27s+talk+about+sex